July 2015 -----> October 2015Let's talk about associating body image with self worth. I've been 157lbs and 21% body fat. I've also been 130lbs and 9% body fat. I will be completely honest with you and tell you that the quality of my life did not improve when I reached what I thought was my "goal body"; I was constantly hungry, cold, couldn't sleep, my workouts were terrible, I cried for no reason because my emotions were out of whack, I distanced myself from others and events that could prevent me from reaching my "goal". My friends and family didn't love me any more than they did after I made this transformation, my happiness did not increase...you get the picture.
Yet now, one year later from both of these pictures, I look like an average healthy woman on the outside, when in reality, what I put my body through has caused major health issues and I'm now paying the price for it. I have lost my menstrual period and have been unable to get it back thus far. My body didn't know that I was getting ready for a bodybuilding competition- it doesn't differentiate that from being on a deserted island, starving. Either way, it's number one job is to keep me alive, so it has to prioritize what's not as important to keep me alive; it shut down my reproductive system first. I have been diagnosed with Hypothalamic Amenorrhea, meaning my hypothalamus in my brain is not sending the correct signals to my ovaries in order to produce a monthly cycle. I currently have the hormones of a post-menopausal woman (low estrogen, hair loss, joint pain, chronic fatigue), and I need to restore and repair my body by cutting back big time on working out, eating more food, stressing less, and just giving my mind and body true health and relaxation. Once my body feels comfortable and less threatened, I should start producing a cycle again.So often we think "Man, if I could just lose some weight", "If I could just get rid of this fat on my arms", "If I had a six pack..". Now, does this mean I am against someone trying to lose weight or become "healthier"? Absolutely not! I AM a personal trainer, friends! But when these obsessive thoughts, desires, and actions cross the line of impacting a person's mental and/or physical health is when I become concerned. When someone begins to associate their body image, weight on the scale, or food they're consuming with how much their life means is when I have a problem. And I have reason and research to believe this is too common of a situation. There are SO many beautiful things in life to focus on and put your energy into rather than trying to shrink your appearance. YOU ARE WORTH MORE THAN YOUR BODY. You don't have to BE on a cut, you don't have to BE on a bulk, you can just BE. You only get one body in this time that you're here on earth. Treat it with respect, nourish it with food and laughter, and do not equate your self worth with the image of the tangible body you are born with.
